The seven core scriptures take us from, understanding our emotions, asking God for help, changing our thinking, delegating control to Christ, God reciprocates with a Helper that facilitates with fruit or values, such as self control and our replacing our old selves and becoming New Creations.
Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”
In the book the Heart of Addiction, Dr. Dodes references the word, “Rage.” Rage is the anger we have when we feel overwhelmed with helpless feelings, when we feel trapped, powerless and out of control. Remember Ron in the book when he was in bumper to bumper traffic and cut off by another driver? Ron was on his way for a drink and when that driver cut him off his emotions boiled over. Nothing was going to stop him from his quick fix or mood changer of alcohol. Ron was in the infamous state of, “Road Rage.” He lost all self-control! The drive-in addictive behavior is rage at helplessness. It is this particular kind of rage that gives addiction its most conspicuous characteristics of intensity and loss of control. The function (purpose) of addiction is to reverse a sense of helplessness. Helplessness in anyone normally produces anger, or in the case of extreme helplessness, rage. Think about times when you have been trapped or powerless. Those situations get you fired up emotionally, and they should. All animals react with aggression to being trapped; it’s a necessary survival instinct. The trick is to Recognize our rage, Reframe our decisions and Replace the corrupt behavior with a measure of self-control given by the Holy Spirit, from a personal relationship with God.
This morning would be week 6 of our class. Here is where we get to the core of behavior change. All addiction experts would acknowledge that good values change people. In Galatians we see the fruit of the Holy Spirit which are nine values. I’m addressing only two of these values because of their importance in our behavior and addiction science.
Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”
As Believers, we have the Holy Spirit with in us. We need to surrender or delegate control to Christ, in order to grow that fruit of the Spirit into Christ like behavior-direct behaviors. When we surrender to God, He empowers us with a mentor, that imparts motivation, conviction, purpose and the fruit of the Holy Spirit called values. Self-control is one of those fruits or values! When we execute self-control, we act with direct healthy behavior and not with displaced behaviors. This is God's scriptural promise and makes Christian Behavior Therapy uniquely successful.
Values are the single most important variable in behavior change!
Values are what the Holy Spirit imparts to us when we delegate control to Christ.
Self-control is a value. Values are what we consider more important than our feelings or emotions.
How much do you value your relationship with Jesus Christ? The answer will measure your self-control. There is no shame in imperfection. God does not expect us to be perfect, but He does expect our best effort, if we value Him.
Dennis Prager, at Prager University, summarizes what is most important in life. "What is the most important thing in life? Money? Happiness? Love? Those things are certainly important, but what matters most is good values. What are values? They are what we consider more important than our feelings. For instance, just about everyone feels like eating junk food, but if you eat whatever you feel like eating you will end up obese and unhealthy. So then, what stops people from eating all the food they feel like eating? The answer is good values. Indeed, a lack of good values is the root of virtually everything wrong with the world. We should act based on values rather than our feelings."
Jesus Christ never taught, "How we should feel." His teachings were based on thinking and our behavior (actions). What Christ teaches is Direct Healthy thinking, that is not conformed to this world, but transforms and renews our minds (Romans 12:2). Christ like thinking and behavior is also used to regain control of circumstances, but is based on the values and tenets of Scripture. “All scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.” (2 Timothy 3:16). Like Paul, we are best served, to think along scriptural lines with biblical values that empower us! Our values are the starting place for all our beliefs, actions and behaviors!
Jesus told his disciples that the core value, the driving value, the eternal value is this: "Does my behavior please God?" "What would Jesus do?" This is not some pithy, trite question. It's a statement, a call, to think before you act. (Matthew records Jesus’ primer on values in Matthew 6:19-21).
The fruit of the Spirit are values! Values are what we consider more important than our feelings. Values give motivation, meaning and purpose to life. When we Intelligently Delegate control to God, He reciprocates with a Helper, the Holy Spirit. SELF CONTROL is one of the values or fruit imparted to us by the Holy Spirit. This is the concept of Intelligent Delegation and Reciprocal Innervation, that leads to Godly values and Christ Driven Behavior that honors God. These are attitudes that result from the Holy Spirit’s work within those who have trusted Jesus as Savior and Lord.
A lack of self-control in any part of our lives does not fit who we are in Christ. His desire is that we live in full surrender to Him so that His Spirit can produce in us the fruit of self-control.
Values often translate to the standards of behavior a person wants to demonstrate—to him- or herself, as well as to others. Our values help define the kind of person we want to be and the kind of life we want to live. When we live in accordance with them, our values influence our priorities, our thinking, our choices, our decision-making and our actions. Dr. Dodes tells us that when you act with Direct behavior instead of displaced behaviors, there is no addiction! What he is saying is that, when your healthy values trump your addiction, there is no addiction, there is self-control. (thinking before you act).
Dr Jud Brewer(addiction Psychiatrist) advocates Mindfullness as the treatment for all addictions and he the evidence to show it works better than any other available secular treatments with experiments. He says what is better than the, "Excitement or reward," of an addiction? His answer is being curious, discover yourself, be with the overwhelming emotion but don't let the emotion be you (this is Mindfullness). Jud claims curiosity is brain hack that swaps the valence of excitement to joy. Jud would say that, "Joy," is what changes people. Joy is the BBO, the Bigger Better Offer. He is absolutely right. Guess what? Joy is the unselfish discovery of a personal surrendered relationship with Jesus Christ. Joy is a value of the Holy Spirit!!!
When you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, it’s much easier to act with the conviction, conduct, character and conversation of Jesus Christ and that is self-control.
In the book the Heart of Addiction, Dr. Dodes references the word, “Rage.” Rage is the anger we have when we feel overwhelmed with helpless feelings, when we feel trapped, powerless and out of control. Remember Ron in the book when he was in bumper to bumper traffic and cut off by another driver? Ron was on his way for a drink and when that driver cut him off his emotions boiled over. Nothing was going to stop him from his quick fix or mood changer of alcohol. Ron was in the infamous state of, “Road Rage.” He lost all self-control! The drive-in addictive behavior is rage at helplessness. It is this particular kind of rage that gives addiction its most conspicuous characteristics of intensity and loss of control. The function (purpose) of addiction is to reverse a sense of helplessness. Helplessness in anyone normally produces anger, or in the case of extreme helplessness, rage. Think about times when you have been trapped or powerless. Those situations get you fired up emotionally, and they should. All animals react with aggression to being trapped; it’s a necessary survival instinct. The trick is to Recognize our rage, Reframe our decisions and Replace the corrupt behavior with a measure of self-control given by the Holy Spirit, from a personal relationship with God.
This morning would be week 6 of our class. Here is where we get to the core of behavior change. All addiction experts would acknowledge that good values change people. In Galatians we see the fruit of the Holy Spirit which are nine values. I’m addressing only two of these values because of their importance in our behavior and addiction science.
Galatians 5:22-23 “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, 23 gentleness, self-control. Against such there is no law.”
As Believers, we have the Holy Spirit with in us. We need to surrender or delegate control to Christ, in order to grow that fruit of the Spirit into Christ like behavior-direct behaviors. When we surrender to God, He empowers us with a mentor, that imparts motivation, conviction, purpose and the fruit of the Holy Spirit called values. Self-control is one of those fruits or values! When we execute self-control, we act with direct healthy behavior and not with displaced behaviors. This is God's scriptural promise and makes Christian Behavior Therapy uniquely successful.
Values are the single most important variable in behavior change!
Values are what the Holy Spirit imparts to us when we delegate control to Christ.
Self-control is a value. Values are what we consider more important than our feelings or emotions.
How much do you value your relationship with Jesus Christ? The answer will measure your self-control. There is no shame in imperfection. God does not expect us to be perfect, but He does expect our best effort, if we value Him.
Dennis Prager, at Prager University, summarizes what is most important in life. "What is the most important thing in life? Money? Happiness? Love? Those things are certainly important, but what matters most is good values. What are values? They are what we consider more important than our feelings. For instance, just about everyone feels like eating junk food, but if you eat whatever you feel like eating you will end up obese and unhealthy. So then, what stops people from eating all the food they feel like eating? The answer is good values. Indeed, a lack of good values is the root of virtually everything wrong with the world. We should act based on values rather than our feelings."
Jesus Christ never taught, "How we should feel." His teachings were based on thinking and our behavior (actions). What Christ teaches is Direct Healthy thinking, that is not conformed to this world, but transforms and renews our minds (Romans 12:2). Christ like thinking and behavior is also used to regain control of circumstances, but is based on the values and tenets of Scripture. “All scripture is inspired by God and is useful to teach us what is true and to make us realize what is wrong in our lives. It corrects us when we are wrong and teaches us to do what is right.” (2 Timothy 3:16). Like Paul, we are best served, to think along scriptural lines with biblical values that empower us! Our values are the starting place for all our beliefs, actions and behaviors!
Jesus told his disciples that the core value, the driving value, the eternal value is this: "Does my behavior please God?" "What would Jesus do?" This is not some pithy, trite question. It's a statement, a call, to think before you act. (Matthew records Jesus’ primer on values in Matthew 6:19-21).
The fruit of the Spirit are values! Values are what we consider more important than our feelings. Values give motivation, meaning and purpose to life. When we Intelligently Delegate control to God, He reciprocates with a Helper, the Holy Spirit. SELF CONTROL is one of the values or fruit imparted to us by the Holy Spirit. This is the concept of Intelligent Delegation and Reciprocal Innervation, that leads to Godly values and Christ Driven Behavior that honors God. These are attitudes that result from the Holy Spirit’s work within those who have trusted Jesus as Savior and Lord.
A lack of self-control in any part of our lives does not fit who we are in Christ. His desire is that we live in full surrender to Him so that His Spirit can produce in us the fruit of self-control.
Values often translate to the standards of behavior a person wants to demonstrate—to him- or herself, as well as to others. Our values help define the kind of person we want to be and the kind of life we want to live. When we live in accordance with them, our values influence our priorities, our thinking, our choices, our decision-making and our actions. Dr. Dodes tells us that when you act with Direct behavior instead of displaced behaviors, there is no addiction! What he is saying is that, when your healthy values trump your addiction, there is no addiction, there is self-control. (thinking before you act).
Dr Jud Brewer(addiction Psychiatrist) advocates Mindfullness as the treatment for all addictions and he the evidence to show it works better than any other available secular treatments with experiments. He says what is better than the, "Excitement or reward," of an addiction? His answer is being curious, discover yourself, be with the overwhelming emotion but don't let the emotion be you (this is Mindfullness). Jud claims curiosity is brain hack that swaps the valence of excitement to joy. Jud would say that, "Joy," is what changes people. Joy is the BBO, the Bigger Better Offer. He is absolutely right. Guess what? Joy is the unselfish discovery of a personal surrendered relationship with Jesus Christ. Joy is a value of the Holy Spirit!!!
When you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, it’s much easier to act with the conviction, conduct, character and conversation of Jesus Christ and that is self-control.
Short Term Solutions:
1. Just go away pg 107
2. Do what you like, what you value
3. It's never too late to act directly after the fact
Long Term Solutions: Four Ways that being an expert on yourself enables you to deal with addiction forever
1. Predict recurrence pg 121 Handbook
2. Step out the trap in key moments
3. Understand your life by understand the emotions underlying your feelings of helplessness help you gain perspective in the present and past.
4. Turning the tables on your addiction: using it to become an expert on yourself. If you don’t know the central problematic issues in your life already, listening to your feelings and thoughts at the key moment of despair and rage will help you to discover them.
Dodes, Lance M.. Breaking Addiction (pp. 125-126). Harper Perennial. Kindle Edition.
1. Just go away pg 107
2. Do what you like, what you value
3. It's never too late to act directly after the fact
Long Term Solutions: Four Ways that being an expert on yourself enables you to deal with addiction forever
1. Predict recurrence pg 121 Handbook
2. Step out the trap in key moments
3. Understand your life by understand the emotions underlying your feelings of helplessness help you gain perspective in the present and past.
4. Turning the tables on your addiction: using it to become an expert on yourself. If you don’t know the central problematic issues in your life already, listening to your feelings and thoughts at the key moment of despair and rage will help you to discover them.
Dodes, Lance M.. Breaking Addiction (pp. 125-126). Harper Perennial. Kindle Edition.
When you have a personal relationship with Jesus Christ, we learn meaning and purpose in life.
Closing VICTORY Prayer:
Lord, I invite you into my life today. Guide my footsteps and help me make wise decisions in order to manage my feelings, my emotions. Help me to regain control over emotional circumstances in life, that make me feel helpless, trapped, powerless and lacking control. I accept that I cannot control everything and I delegate that control to you, so that you will transform my thinking and empower me, through the Holy Spirit. Empower me to regain control with (Direct), assertive, Christ Driven values and behavior and not with (Displaced substitute behaviors), the quick fixes or mood changers of chemicals and other errant behaviors. Always allow me to be sensitive to Your Will, especially if You desire to change my plans and behavior.
Lord, I invite you into my life today. Guide my footsteps and help me make wise decisions in order to manage my feelings, my emotions. Help me to regain control over emotional circumstances in life, that make me feel helpless, trapped, powerless and lacking control. I accept that I cannot control everything and I delegate that control to you, so that you will transform my thinking and empower me, through the Holy Spirit. Empower me to regain control with (Direct), assertive, Christ Driven values and behavior and not with (Displaced substitute behaviors), the quick fixes or mood changers of chemicals and other errant behaviors. Always allow me to be sensitive to Your Will, especially if You desire to change my plans and behavior.
