The seven core scriptures take us from, understanding our emotions, asking God for help, changing our thinking, delegating control to Christ, God reciprocates with a Helper that facilitates with fruit or values, such as self control and our replacing our old selves and becoming New Creations.
Matthew 11:28-30: 28 “Come to Me, all you who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. 29 Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am [a]gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. 30 For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”
Christ uses three key verbs when speaking of stress management: come, learn, and take. Christ wants us to come to Him, collaborate with Him, learn from Him, take on a lighter load. God does not give us overcoming life— He gives us grace, as we overcome. Life is not fair, easy or painless and we will never always get what we want. Discomfort is the price of admission if you want to have a meaningful life. The strain of life is what builds our strength. If there is no strain, there will be no strength. The number-one contributor to growth is difficult circumstances. All addictions are a by-product of how we decide to manage difficult circumstances.
God wants us to regain control of our overwhelming, helpless feelings by giving Him control with direct health behavior and not substitute sinful behavior. No one would deny that life is full of adversity. We are helpless to control all our circumstances, but we can control how we think about our circumstances and how we respond. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference. (Yoked with Jesus: A physical yoke is designed to bind oxen together to carry heavy loads. In contrast, the spiritual yoke Jesus offers us is light, granting peace and a restful spirit. We simply weren't created to carry heartache and troubles on our own. Shoulder to shoulder with Him, every burden is eased. Matthew 11:28-30
LORD,
Thank for the opportunity to be involved and serve You in this class. Thank you for the men and women here tonight who chose to be here, to be curious, courageous and vulnerable. We invite you into our lives tonight Lord, guide of sharing, allow us to be open to new ways of thinking and learning; help us to help ourselves and help others. Help us to understand WHY we behave the way we do and how we can change what needs to be changed in our lives, in order to be better people and serve You better in this world. In Jesus name we pray!
Thank for the opportunity to be involved and serve You in this class. Thank you for the men and women here tonight who chose to be here, to be curious, courageous and vulnerable. We invite you into our lives tonight Lord, guide of sharing, allow us to be open to new ways of thinking and learning; help us to help ourselves and help others. Help us to understand WHY we behave the way we do and how we can change what needs to be changed in our lives, in order to be better people and serve You better in this world. In Jesus name we pray!
- Wolf Parable:
A grandfather is talking with his grandson and he says there are two wolves inside of us which are always at battle.
One is a good wolf which represents things like kindness, bravery, and love. The other is a bad wolf, which represents things like greed, hatred, and fear.
The grandson stops and thinks about it for a second then he looks up at his grandfather and says, “Grandfather, which one wins?”
The grandfather quietly replies, “The one you feed.”
What does this parable mean to you in your life? In Genesis 3, God gives humanity their first lesson in behavior. In Genesis 3, Adam and Eve were given a choice to act with a direct behavior that honored God or a displaced behavior, that dishonored God, in that they ate the forbidden fruit of knowledge (in order to become like God). This is more than a cautionary tale, a moral fable, this is the Word of God, clarifying and simplifying, who is in control, who is God and who is not.
1. Define Addiction: Trent and I give examples
2. Discuss Scripture both Proverbs and Mathew (Round Table)
3. Answer homework questions below
4. Audible reading 24 minute mark on Ron 6.29 mark --28.29
5. Fill in below answering questions as pertains to our lives
2. Discuss Scripture both Proverbs and Mathew (Round Table)
3. Answer homework questions below
4. Audible reading 24 minute mark on Ron 6.29 mark --28.29
5. Fill in below answering questions as pertains to our lives
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What emotion do I "feel," right before I have that urge and decide to take that drink, do a drug or engage in any compulsive behavior? Recognizing or being aware of this feeling is the first step toward understanding why we act in certain ways. RECOGNITION is Critical to understanding our Emotional IQ, which is the ability to make our emotions work for us instead of against us.
Give examples in your life of how you felt, helpless, trapped, powerless and out of control with respect to certain circumstances.
What is the purpose of addictive behavior?
What is the drive behind addictive behavior?
What is a displaced or substitute behavior?
What is a direct behavior?
Recognize: We learn to recognize the emotions or feelings behind the circumstances that cause us to feel overwhelmingly helpless.
Reframe: We learn to re-frame our thinking with respect to our displaced behaviors. (Cost benefit analysis)
Replace: We learn to replace our corrupted displaced behaviors with direct healthy Christ Driven Behaviors that honor God.
When we understand the psychology behind our thinking and our emotions we can learn to reverse our sense of helplessness and regain control of our lives. When people feel utterly trapped they have to do something, and if they feel they can't act directly to get out of that trap, then they have to do something else. The "something else" is, therefore, a substitute action (technically called a "displacement"). When people repetitively perform a displaced action to try to manage overwhelming helplessness, we call this driven, compulsive behavior an addiction. But there's always something people can do at these overwhelming moments that is more direct! ( even if not perfect). People find that when they take direct healthy action, the addictive urge almost always vanishes! This sounds like magic but it makes sense because having acted more directly, they no longer need a substitute behavior. (chapter #8 Treatment )
Give examples in your life of how you felt, helpless, trapped, powerless and out of control with respect to certain circumstances.
What is the purpose of addictive behavior?
What is the drive behind addictive behavior?
What is a displaced or substitute behavior?
What is a direct behavior?
Recognize: We learn to recognize the emotions or feelings behind the circumstances that cause us to feel overwhelmingly helpless.
Reframe: We learn to re-frame our thinking with respect to our displaced behaviors. (Cost benefit analysis)
Replace: We learn to replace our corrupted displaced behaviors with direct healthy Christ Driven Behaviors that honor God.
When we understand the psychology behind our thinking and our emotions we can learn to reverse our sense of helplessness and regain control of our lives. When people feel utterly trapped they have to do something, and if they feel they can't act directly to get out of that trap, then they have to do something else. The "something else" is, therefore, a substitute action (technically called a "displacement"). When people repetitively perform a displaced action to try to manage overwhelming helplessness, we call this driven, compulsive behavior an addiction. But there's always something people can do at these overwhelming moments that is more direct! ( even if not perfect). People find that when they take direct healthy action, the addictive urge almost always vanishes! This sounds like magic but it makes sense because having acted more directly, they no longer need a substitute behavior. (chapter #8 Treatment )
Homework: Chapters 3,4,5
The VICTORY Prayer:
Lord, I invite you into my life today. Guide my footsteps and help me make wise decisions in order to manage my feelings, my emotions. Help me to regain control over emotional circumstances in life, that make me feel helpless, trapped, powerless and lacking control. I accept that I cannot control everything and I delegate that control to you, so that you will transform my thinking and empower me, through the Holy Spirit. Empower me to regain control with (Direct), assertive, Christ Driven values and behavior and not with (Displaced substitute behaviors), the quick fixes or mood changers of chemicals and other errant behaviors. Always allow me to be sensitive to Your Will, especially if You desire to change my plans and behavior.
Lord, I invite you into my life today. Guide my footsteps and help me make wise decisions in order to manage my feelings, my emotions. Help me to regain control over emotional circumstances in life, that make me feel helpless, trapped, powerless and lacking control. I accept that I cannot control everything and I delegate that control to you, so that you will transform my thinking and empower me, through the Holy Spirit. Empower me to regain control with (Direct), assertive, Christ Driven values and behavior and not with (Displaced substitute behaviors), the quick fixes or mood changers of chemicals and other errant behaviors. Always allow me to be sensitive to Your Will, especially if You desire to change my plans and behavior.
